Two stupid lists that no one cares about.

Things I hate:
School
Work
My broken phone
My bruised shin
My missing tweezers
Cold wind
Dieting
Unpaid bills
Unpacking
My split ends
Procrastination
Stupidity
Boys
8 o'clock classes

Things I like:
Battlestar Galactica
Vitamin E
No class after 10 am Friday
My gray hairs
Baby carrots
Blankets
Socks
Financial aid
Friends and family
Catching up
Randomly nice strangers
Infomercials
Peppermint body wash
Keeping a journal

From freerice.com today.

fop means:
dandy

magnum means:
large wine bottle

flense means:
strip blubber from

All in all, a very fun vocabulary day.

There are too many pictures.

And not enough words on my blog. But this is probably the greatest lolcat I've ever seen.



I didn't think it was possible to make lolcats any geekier. I was wrong. As it's usually the case, a Star Wars reference will exponentially increase your nerdiness.

Sadly this is how I spend my time.

Yesterday at work, I made these lolcats instead of doing anything that could be considered productive.

Go me.

Wasting time is far too enjoyable.

Friend of a friend wrote this survey. Pretty funny shit.

The best tasting M&M color is...
red.

Who's outlook on life needs the most adjustment — Oscar the Grouch or Eeyore?
Eeyore is a little bitch.

Funyuns are...
stinky.

Name one reality TV personality who needs a good cock-punching.
Ryan Seacrest. I know he's a host, but seriously, who's gonna argue with that?

Kansas or Boston?
Boston.

Name someone or something who you've thrown up on?
My own sweater.

Slush puppies or Icees?
Icees.

Vampire or Zombie movies?
Zombie.

Worse to be surrounded by...hippies or hipsters?
One is smelly and one just sucks. Hipsters.

The one drink that turns me into a heinous bitch/ ornery douchebag is...
Tequila.

How many robot sluts attack your friend request inbox per day?
Zero.

Better pet — E.T or Gizmo (or any other mogwai)?
E.T.

Would you rather do Jodie Foster in Maverick or in Nell?
Umm, neither, but if I were a dude. . . Maverick. And I'd definitely do Mel Gibson in Maverick. That was before he turned anti-semitic and crazy.

Worst public bathroom you've had to endure?
Churchill's "Pub" in Miami.

Favorite terrible movie?
Some would argue that all the movies I like are terrible, but I think I'll go with 50 First Dates.

Worst place you've woken up?
Ugh. On the floor, freezing cold. This has happened more than once.

Weirdest food item consumed from a gas station?
I ate a BLT one time. It was not good.

Dane Cook...
used to be funny.

Where were you when Janet Jackson sent a nation into a panic at the site of an expose part of the human anatomy?
Asleep? I think it was naptime for me. I didn't watch the Super Bowl that year.

Favorite frozen treat?
Anything involving Oreos and vanilla ice cream.

Favorite state fair food?
Funnel cake.

Your thoughts on clowns?
Creepy, duh.

Would your rather have participated in Legends of the Hidden Temple or GUTS?
Legends of the Hidden Temple, duh.

Sexiest body part: Feet, ears, or elbows?
Ears?

Would you have Ken Jennings' children?
No. Ken Jennings is an ass-clowning d-bag.

Toad-licking or robo-tripping?
The first one.

My unimportant two pence.

Maybe it's just because I know too many hipster boys, but all I've heard about lately is the new Radiohead album. Well, I've downloaded it, too, so I thought I'd weigh in, even though no one reads this, and even if they did, they wouldn't care. Also, I know shit about music, and am definitely not hip, so don't take what I write here as gospel, and don't assume that I at all know what I'm talking about.

First of all, how fucking smart are they to have it available as pay what you want? I mean, that really touched this tightwad's heart. And, if I loved it, I would pay the regular price for the discbox, and it's always a good thing to get paid twice. They get some money from people who aren't really fans, but they're also certain to get the full cost from the super-duper fans. It's a brilliant maneuver and hopefully, a lesson to the music industry who are always whining like little babies about how they don't make enough money.

But I digress. I've listened to In Rainbows twice, and I'm just not sure. I think that the opening song, is actually kind of weak. I mean, it's cool and all, just not really what I expected them to choose to set the tone for this long-awaited album. Bodysnatchers, hmm, this one is just really confusing. Once the instrumentation changes, (2 minutes into the track??) I really like it, I guess I just like half the song. . . Anyway, redemption comes with Nude. This song is fucking gorgeous, and reminds me of what I originally loved about Radiohead. Weird Fishes/Arpeggi I'm trying hard to like. (That sounds bad.) I don't even really dislike it, I guess I just think it's the reverse of the problem with Bodysnatchers. It gets weird about halfway through, and then I don't like the rest of it. All I Need is a good song, albeit somewhat boring. Faust Arp is a nice choice for a short, simple interlude, although a little complexity wouldn't hurt, but Reckoner is a pretty big deal to introduce, now that I think about it. And actually, since I'm listening to this album for the third time as I type this post, I kind of think that Reckoner is one of the best things I've heard in a while. And I like the last three songs, so I guess I actually do like this album. A lot. Also, I think I need to be high the next time I listen to it.

Basically, I think that Kid A is Radiohead's best album, and no matter how many times I listen to it, I am always surprised by how good it is. (Well, some days I like The Bends better, not gonna lie.) But the more I listen to In Rainbows, the better it is, so I think that although it wasn't the epiphanic experience that Kid A was, it is an impressive addition to the repertoire. Maybe the moral of the story is that the fans' expectations rise way too high when they have to wait a long time for a new record. So, yeah, get to it. With a little speed, s'il vous plait.

Around the way girl.

Umm, that is one of my favorite rap songs, ever. Anywho. . .

Halloween is approaching and I don't have a costume yet. Even though I didn't get a chance to wear my "Your Mom" costume last year, the idea is already played out in my head, and I can't do that. In case you haven't heard about that one (or if you want to steal it), the idea was to wear a turtleneck / windbreaker outfit with white tennis shoes. Gold chain pendant on the outside of the turtleneck, poufy hair, heavy makeup. When people ask who I'm dressed up as, I reply, "your mom." Man, that was an awesome idea. Oh well. Year before that I was K-Fed (a full year before Andy-fuckin' Roddick btw). That was a sweet-ass costume too.

Right now I'm not feeling very creative. Amy Winehouse would be funny, but I'm not really thin enough for that. Hmmm, I'll have to think on this. In other, completely unimportant news, I took a midterm today. I'm pretty sure I made an A, not bragging, just truthful. In philosophy, we had a class debate on abortion which was as incredibly hellacious as it sounds. In another class, we discussed The Awakening, and if I have to read that again, I might have to drown myself. So, yeah, school is going great. Really friggin' great.

Money in my pocket, but I still act trife.

So, I have a new job. In addition to my awesomely nerdy library job, I'm also working as a copy editor for the school newspaper, The Beacon. I got hired today, and much to my surprise, they're actually gonna pay me. Basically I have to edit and proofread articles, editorials, all that type of shit. There are all these formatting rules determined by the Associated Press. Like, percentages must be expressed in numeral form, not spelled out. In addition to those, the paper has produced its own rules. For instance, certain things can be expressed by an acronym in the first mention, while other things can't. I'll also have to write headlines, eventually. I have a lovely handout that gives a list of verbs that are strictly forbidden in headlines. These are: rocks, hosts, holds, offers. Why? I have no idea, the handout provides zero explanation. So, it's all very boring, and you don't need a more thorough description than the one I've already given.

But let me tell you about another amazing handout titled, "A few suggestions for copy editing." It is awesome. So hilarious. It misspells comma every single time. There's a lot of fucking information on comma use. So, guys, the most important thing that I learned from this paperwork is that I don't need to slip into a coma when completing a series. The hard part is avoiding that when reading this goddamn newspaper.

p.s. Don't think that my blog grammar is going to change. I don't proofread this shit.

I don't have to. All I know is it happened.

So, yesterday Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. died. In a 2003 interview he said, "One kid said he had the key to all my books and he put it in a sentence. He said, 'Love may fail but courtesy will prevail.' Love does fail all the time, you know, and it makes people vicious."

He was the author who got me interested in reading. I used to go to the library a lot after class in high school. I would pick a random book, and start reading it. If I liked it, I'd check it out. I read a couple of chick-lit books, (it was Bridget Jones heyday, shut up) but I got bored with that really quickly. That was when I learned that just because I like one book, I won't necessarily like the whole genre. So anyway, I would just walk down the fiction aisles waiting for something to pop out at me. One day I walked past the Vonnegut section, and I picked up Cat's Cradle. I stood in front of the bookshelf and read the first few chapters. I finished that in a few days, and then I read Galapagos, then Breakfast of Champions, then Slapstick, and Welcome to the Monkey House, and Slaughterhouse-Five, and Hocus Pocus.

About four years later, my dad loaned me his copy of Bluebeard. I still haven't given it back. It's my all-time favorite. I don't really know why, maybe I just think one-eyed Armenian painters are awesome. Anyway, somewhere along the way I had switched from the library to the bookstore. So I began to build my collection of (legitimately purchased) Vonnegut books.

When talking about his decision to stop writing novels, he said, "I felt as I did when the Second World War ended: Please, I've done everything I'm supposed to do, can't I go home now?".